What makes me?

what makes me?

"heal my heart and make it clean,

open up my heart to the things unseen,

show me how to love like you have loved me,

break my heart for what breaks Yours,

Everything I am for Your kingdom cause, 

As I walk from earth into eternity."

This part of bridge spoke to my heart so deeply. An usual worship service, but with unusual presence of Him. I was touched, felt every word I sang was from Him. Heart was really painful, tears couldn't held back anymore. Not because I was emotional...

There is no reason why I felt this way. I'm loving my life. I enjoy every moment. I thought I could handle all these? I thought I am strong enough? and I thought I can fight for more? Everyday is a battlefield; Doing the things that I love and enjoy are the greatest blessing for me. I won't mind to give more of myself to others; but this is tough when your close ones never even give a word of encouragement and yet they curse you, forsake you, judge you...

Really... I really want to know why? "Break my heart for what break Yours", this is the answer. He choose to sacrifice first, the price I have to pay is nothing compare to Him. 

"Heal my heart and make it clean"... God is so amazing, he will always send random and unexpected people into my life. These angels came to me and said: LiHui, there is always have somebody who will always love you." 

I was shocked. Like flashback, it brought me back to few years back when I was sitting alone at a coffee shop. I met a pastor from United States. That day was my birthday, but I wasn't in the mood at that point of time. Pastor was talking to me, he prayed and even prophesied for me. The last word he said to me was exactly the same thing:"LiHui, somebody is always there for you." 

This phrase spoke to me every year when I meet this point of life, stumble; It is not a word of revelation that falling randomly from the sky. I know this is how God shower me with all His love. Same words but coming from different voices... What can i say? Tears falling but with peace, touched in my heart, knowing that I'm loved no matter how much pain I have to go through.

True friends will show you how much they love you through their action. Thank you :) I'm really blessed. Don't worry, lihui will keep fighting 'cause I'm born to be a fighter.